The Pish

I am moving to Texas and opening a non-profit school and I will refuse to accept federal money. Then I will begin granting myself Master’s degrees in the following subjects:

Underpants

Advanced Underpants

Dreaming

Joy

Bizarre Coincidences!

Sports

Bad Impressions of Ethnic Groups

Unfounded Fears

I totally want a Masters in bizarre coincidences! as long as there is an exclamation mark on my diploma

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Mar
16th

Mon

Choices

The gym… or pizza and old episodes of Desperate Housewives. Which do you think I chose?

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Mar
15th

Sun

Because everyone needs a little love on a Sunday night

Some things will never get old

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AIG: they really don’t get it

From HuffPo:

A growing bipartisan chorus of lawmakers are condemning insurance giant AIG for deciding to pay out $165 million in bonuses despite receiving $170 billion in taxpayer bailout funds and some are demanding that AIG renounce the bonuses - or else.

How were AIG’s PR people planning on spinning this? It’s just one big “Fuck You” to America. Thanks, guys.

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davebc:

Because only the most pretentious fashion stores deserve a live DJ

So what does it mean that my gym had a live DJ yesterday?

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Mar
13th

Fri

Elmo is awesome!

My little nephew’s current favorite thing in the world is Elmo, so I have seen many videos of the cute little puppet. But never like this!

“It’s called acting, Mr. Gervais. Acting.”

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ericasavestheday:

soupsoup:mikehudack:ledenes:

Why did no one tell me that Christopher Walken is on Twitter??

Christopher Walken is my new favorite Twitterer. He is hilarious.

“I feel like I should explain my absence but nothing good ever comes from listening to my feelings. For the record - I’m furrowing my brow.”

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